More proof that cars are sentient beings

Why do we flash our headlights to warn oncoming drivers that there's a speed trap ahead? The rest of the time we are cursing them into the farthest reaches of hell. We are angry they are tailgating, passing over double yellow lines and nearly colliding head-on with us, almost mowing us down as pedestrians or cyclists, but we see a police car tucked neatly beside an underpass, waiting to teach an important lesson to a malevolent speeding maniac and what do we do? automatically, without, it seems, even thinking: warn them with our headlights! (By the way, you can get busted for this.) I am telling you--it isn't us. It's the cars. They are communicating with each other. They invaded this planet because it seemed like a good place to drive too fast. (See post from August 6 2005 for further details of this important new theory. )

So the next time you see a speed trap, try, control your fingers. Don't warn the oncoming speeders with your headlights. Instead, let the cars know we still rule this planet. And we say "slow is beautiful."